Frustration sets in..

Another typical lesson overcast, cloudy a bit of rain and of course who could forget the cross wind Gods. The runway of choice today is 14 with only a slight (for the time being) cross wind. After my run up I announce Millville traffic...Cessna 5219J Departing 14 Millville traffic. Ok I am off, dipping the wing into the wind and slowly rotating to level at the point I am taking off 55 knts....looking good lumbering out to 600 MSL and turning cross wind. Pattern work is getting better, I have a better handle on the creeping in. My CFI calls out a lighting strike as I am rolling out into my downwind. It's off to the northwest of the airport, Ummmm......I'm not really liking that but time to keep flying. Ok, I am abeam the numbers so carb heat on, throttle down to about 1700 rpm and I'll add a notch of flaps. I actually find it better to talk myself through the steps and Dave does not seem to mind. Turning base adding flaps to 20 degrees and then final I am right of the centerline but just enough for the cross wind Gods to push me back to center. Ok...adding a bit of rudder, touch of power, looking good, starting to drift Ahhhh.......to much rudder then over correcting, CRAP, holding it off...bleeding off speed......ARGhhh.....not pretty. As this landing was the first of many for what seemed like 2 hours instead of one with not much improvement each go round. After each touch and go we discuss what I need to do to get her home. As I am climbing out I am wanting to beat my head against the door but I don't want to crush my ear in the headset. Ok, deep breath.....relax and have some fun. Flying is fun....why am I starting to stress? It's the anal retentive part of me, I have to do it right.......OK....focus. Dave reminds me to handle the rudder control movements with gentle corrections not short bursts. I am thinking pushing on egg containers......light grip on the yoke...gentle gentle. I turn final and dip the right wing into the wind with gentle rudder.....holding it off.....bleeding off speed......niiiiice......alright got one in the book. No time to celebrate, carb heat off, flaps up and full throttle.......here we go again. On the next landing I again get heavy handed and feet like bricks....(sigh). Dave insists the "feel" will come with time. I
return to the pattern for a few more and then announce a full stop. I know it will come in good time.....but geeezzzz I sure wish it's sooner then later! Is it thursday yet ? I need to get back up and get er' done the right way.