Tuesday, September 04, 2018

Random Thoughts During Recovery

The Physical Challenge

Mary and I have been through so much. The physical challenges have been non-stop since the day of the accident, but, we are making progress.  A simple task of putting my pants on is such an accomplishment...insert my typical eye roll... Trying to feed the dog and cats or clean a litter box with bending, lifting and twisting restrictions has been a real pain for Mary. Cat litter boxes are beyond her allowed weight restriction so it takes coordination with neighbors to perform this simple task.  Let's not forget she still can't drive and my bride has to deal with yours truly 24/7. It's never easy for people to ask for help and we are no exception, its been a very humbling experience.

Last night was the first night I slept in our bed since June 28th. We are having the hospital bed removed today.  Sounds pretty simple, right?  I have looked at our bed since I came home from the hospital, every single time, all three times. I finally conquered that hurdle. The simple things mean so much as we try and put our lives back together.

The Mental Challenge

The emotional part of all this is like the boogeyman, floating around in both our heads but not a topic for discussion at this time. We understand our lives have changed, forever, as well as our lifestyle and passion for travel. I know at some point the accident will be addressed and it will be good for the both of us to let it all out. I'm not sure when this will happen, but as of yet, it has not been the right time. 

One morning...

Mary and I were going over our daily ritual of quicken updates now that I can wheel in to the office. As we sat discussing something my computers screen saver kicked in and right before us pictures of our many destinations flashed.  Our conversation stopped, not a word was said, as we fixated on the screen. When we looked at each other we were both in tears...it hit home that for us life has drastically changed. We hugged, both acknowledging how much we enjoyed our travels by way of our magic carpet.

Our life will keep moving forward, and we are both very thankful for that. As to flying again, not a clue where that will go and honestly we could care less at this time. We have forged friendships even deeper and made new friends along this journey. We will continue to appreciate the time we have together.

Ever since I was a child I learned many life lessons. From my years playing baseball, throughout my school years and even over my work career, there was always something to learn and carry forward. This experience is the same, although I am struggling with what it is I need to take away from it all. I do have an even deeper love for my bride and know there is nothing we can not rise above, together. Maybe it's the lesson of accepting help from others so that we may give more to others when we are healthy. Maybe I'm just trying to solve a life puzzle that is still missing a few pieces.

Our journey will continue moving forward. Mary and I look forward to the day we can once again travel to new destinations and enjoy exploring and meeting new people. For now we heal, enjoy our own company, and our family and friends that surround us. Life is good.

20 comments:

Ward Novak said...

Gary, Only the best wishes from Marty and I!! At some point we need to get together. I know how much you enjoyed the freedom of flight, and sincerely hope for a bright and positive future upon your mending. Stay strong my friend!

Beth Harper said...


Both Gary and I continue to keep you both in our hearts and prayers. One step at a time .... sleeping in your own bed - now that sounds like you're going to have a very good day. Be kind to yourselves - life has a way of sorting things out. Wishing you both peace and continued strength as you heal physically and emotionally.

Doug Muse said...

One step at a time! You two are doing great and keep focusing on the next step. Don't say your travel passion is gone as it will come back. You may change from a flying carpet to a nice cushion seat in a RV. The passion continues to live but focusing on getting back to full strength is top priority for you both.

Lin Ciotti said...

Thinking of you and Mary often ,wish I was close to help you. Love you

Bill Suffa said...

Gary,

You and Mary are an inspiration. With all that you have accomplished so far in recovering, and your spirit and determination to do even more in the future, I see a very inspiring story. Passing that story of determination and recovery along to others is wonderful.

Keep the spirits up and moving forward step by step.

Best to both you and Mary.

Gary said...

Ward & Marty

"At some point we need to get together. I know how much you enjoyed the freedom of flight, and sincerely hope for a bright and positive future upon your mending. Stay strong my friend!"

We would love to catch up. It may be awhile unless your heading down to OCMD for the corvette weekend. Thanks for the positive thoughts.

Gary said...

Beth and Gary

"Be kind to yourselves - life has a way of sorting things out. Wishing you both peace and continued strength as you heal physically and emotionally."

Great words to live by! We continue to heal and at some point will deal with the emotional part of all this. It's heartbreaking for us both to even think about giving up flying but that is a very real possibility. Mary and I both talked about traveling via commercial and we both lost it today. It will sort itself out when we're ready, whenever that is. Thanks for your kind words.

Gary said...

Doug and Susan,

Agree! Well for me it's literally, one step at a time. I'm making progress and the right leg is getting stronger everyday. PT tortured me pretty hard today and he let me try negotiating the ramp to the driveway. It went very well and he was impressed. I think he likes having a patient that WANTS to keep working hard at recovery.

Mary and I will miss seeing you both at BACFest but I hope you post pictures for us. Safe travels!

Chris said...

Gary, thank you for sharing this thoughtful and beautiful post. I think of you and Mary often. Heal well, my friend!

Gary said...

Lin,

We would never ask anyone to come back to the winters here when you could continue out on the links inspiring me to one day get my golf game squared away. I follow those posts on FB ;) You have such a big heart, we love you too.

Gary said...

Bill,

While I may be broken physically, I am fighting back and working hard to get back to ....well, whatever my normal physical state was. Emotionally it's been a battle, my spirit is hurting but never dashed. Mary and I will both return to a "normal" life stronger then ever, it will just take some time. Thanks for your thoughts and kind words.

Gary said...

Chris,

"Gary, thank you for sharing this thoughtful and beautiful post. I think of you and Mary often. Heal well, my friend!"

You're Welcome.

Well, you know my posts, they tend to ramble on sometimes spinning off on a tangent but always from the heart. Sometimes this is good and sometimes, well let's not go there. :) Thanks for keeping us in your thoughts, we will continue to heal and keep moving forward each day.

Looking forward to more posts on your blog.

Chris said...

Gary,

“Looking forward to more posts on your blog.”

As you know, I’ve been on my own journey for the past couple of months that has put me into a necessary hiatus. One of these days, I’ll be able to get back to it. My flying hours are through the roof, though. I cleared 100 for the year last weekend. I’ve been using the airplane to commute to the Midwest.

Unknown said...

Gary, The comments in this blog show that you are helping us all in our life journey. We are so saddened that you two have to be going through this, but at the same time, we are amazed at your resiliency, your forward thinking about the future, and your willingness to live a day at a time. We are all looking up to you, but don't feel like you have to do anything in return. We will miss you at BACFest more than you know, but we will meet again when the time is right. God bless you and Mary always!

Jim and Sandie said...

Gary, you and Mary are amazing examples of perseverance and love for each other. I'm sure that being able to sleep next to your bride is a really good feeling. So one step at a time and you are making great progress. Some day when the time is right you make decisions about flying and traveling. But for now, just recover. God bless you both.

Anonymous said...

"...although I am struggling with what it is I need to take away from it all".... your next great novel my dear friend

Steve said...

There's nothing that tells me you'll be just fine than the typical Gary rambling about every little thing. :)

You guys have been through hell and back and I know it's not over... but here in OH we're so thankful you two remain on the mend and have so many wonderful folks in your lives to rely on.

Stay strong, buddy!

Gary said...

Jim and Sandie,
Yes, when the timing is right. For now, it's all about healing and keeping focused.

Unknown, Mary and I will be looking forward to many pictures and the stories associated with BACFest 2018. My blog will be missing this years post but we look forward to next year, wherever that may bring us.

Anonymous said...
"...although I am struggling with what it is I need to take away from it all".... your next great novel my dear friend."
That has to be you Lynn....I'm sure something's in the works. As far as great...well I'll be happy to just have someone else enjoy it. ;)

Gary said...

Steve said...
"There's nothing that tells me you'll be just fine than the typical Gary rambling about every little thing."

Yep, that's me. yammering on about nothing sometimes ;) We are continuing to make progress. Thanks for checking in. I see you and the family were flying north the end of June, always love the pics.

Steve said...

We have flown a bit since then. Unfortunately, I've been working absurd hours (and we bought a new house) so my blogging time is nil. I have more than a couple posts hanging strong in draft mode.

Knowing someone out there reads them does keep me going... I'll get them posted sooner or later!